By: Dr. J.
For years, I thought nurturing was something I only gave others. I thought the soft, intuitive part of me existed only for mothering, loving, serving — and that to use it on myself was selfish or unnecessary.
But something shifted recently.
I woke up in the middle of the night with a headache. My first instinct was to ignore it, to roll over and “push through.” But then I imagined one of my children waking me up in pain. I wouldn’t hesitate for them — I’d get up, comfort them, care for them without a second thought.
So I got up ‘for me’.
Downstairs, I whispered to myself, “Come on, baby girl…” and I meant it. I poured a glass of mint and cucumber water, added lemon and a pinch of salt under my tongue, and applied lavender and peppermint oils to my neck and arms. I rested with my eye massager and neck stretcher while the scent of essential oils wrapped around me like a lullaby. Within minutes, the pain began to lift.
It wasn’t just the water or the oils that helped. It was how I showed up for myself.
A Ritual, Not a Routine
The next morning, I didn’t abandon that tenderness. I continued it — because I know what my body needs as my cycle approaches: softness, grounding, peace.
I prepared more infused waters — cucumber and basil, mint and lemon — and then sat on my personal yoni steam pot, breathing in a healing blend of herbs: jasmine, wormwood, rose petals, mint leaves, dandelion, and more. As the steam rose, so did my affirmations:
“My softness is sacred.”
“I am grounded in my truth.”
“I am safe in my body.”
“I don’t need to be needed to be worthy.”
Later, I stepped into my portable sauna with those same herbs, allowing them to rise again through my pores. My house smelled like lavender and freedom.
I wasn’t rushing. I wasn’t “checking off” self-care.
I was creating a sanctuary — from the inside out.
Meals Made with Love (for Me)
Lunch was avocado toast with tomato and red onion, paired with a green salad full of strawberries, blue cheese, and candied pecans. For dinner, I grilled salmon, toasted bread, and made another salad because my body said yes to nourishment.
I sipped coconut water in a wine glass, not for the aesthetic — but because I deserve joy in the details.
I ended the day under a weighted blanket, watching an episode of Elementary, feeling warm, whole, and deeply tended to.
This is Cycle Care. This is Self-Mothering. This is Me.
Too many women wait until they’re burned out to rest. We call it “strength” when we ignore our bodies. But true strength?
It’s listening.
It’s responding.
It’s loving ourselves the way we love everyone else.
And this was just one day.
I plan to share more of my rituals and reflections, especially as I care for myself before and during my cycle. Because our stress matters. Our breath matters. Our softness is not a luxury — it’s sacred.
How do you care for yourself when your body speaks?
Leave a comment below or share this with a woman who needs a reminder:
You don’t have to earn rest. You are worthy of care — right now.
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